To sum up
the four hours of discussion that followed,
it's not
easy being in a relationship,
much less
to truly know the other one and accept them as they are,
with all
their flaws and baggage.
He
confessed to me his fear
of being
rejected if I truly knew him,
if he
showed himself totally bare to me.
He realised
after two years of being with me, he didn't
know me at
all, nor did I know him.
And to
truly love each other we needed
to know the
truth about each other,
even if
it's not so easy to take.
So I told
him the truth,
which was
I'd never cheated on him.
And I also
told him whom have I been with those days,
He did not
get mad at me, cause nothing happened,
Of course.
I confessed
to him that the toughest thing for me was
to decide
to be with someone for good
the idea
that this is it, this is the person
I'm going
to spend the rest of my life with.
To decide
that I will make the effort
to stay and
work things out,
and not run
off the minute there is
a problem
is very difficult for me.
I told him
I could not be for just one man
for the
rest of my life.
It was a
lie, but I said it anyway.
He asked me
if I thought I was a squirrel,
collecting
men like nuts
to put away
for cold winters.
I thought
it was quite funny.
Then he
said something
that hurt
my feelings.
The tone
changed drastically.
Then I
misunderstood him. I thought
he meant he
didn't love me anymore.
It always
fascinates me how people go
from loving
you madly, to nothing at all.
Nothing. It
hurts so much.
When I feel
someone is going to leave me
I have a
tendency to break up first,
before I
get to hear the whole thing.
Here it is.
One more, one less,
another
wasted love story.
I really
loved this one.
When I
think that it's over,
that I'll
never see him again like this..
That I'll
bump into him someday, we'll meet
our new
boyfriend and girlfriend,
and act as
if we had never been together.
Then we'll
slowly think of each other
less and
less, until we forget each other completely.
Almost.
Always the
same for me -
break up,
break down.
Drink up,
fool around,
meet one
guy, then another,
fuck around
to forget the one and only.
Then after
a few months of emptiness,
start again
to look for true love.
Desperately
look everywhere
and, after
two years of loneliness,
meet a new
love and swear it is the one,
until that
one is gone as well.
There's a
moment in life where you can't
recover any
more from another break-up.
And even if
this person bugs you 60% of
the time,
you still can't live without him.
And even if
he wakes you up every day
by sneezing
right in your face,
well, you
will love his sneezes
more than
anyone else's kisses.
2 Days in Paris
